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Katie and Carol talk about Tip 17 from Skirt Strategies: 249 Success T
ips for Women in Leadership.
In this episode Katie and Carol give you practical tips to be clear with your superiors about what authority to act you have and don’t have. It’s a great way to start a conversation … one that may avoid future misinterpretations.
Tip #17. Always be clear to your superiors about what you believe your level of authority is.
In other words, have regular conversations about what you believe your boundaries are and the expectations that come along with them. You are likely to have more authority than you think. Take advantage of that and you will be seen as a go-getter.
As promised in this episode we are giving you a model to use when delegating to others. Enjoy this Freedom to act model
Have a conversation with your boss that may include questions like:
- Do you think I take as much initiative as needed?
- Is there anything you’d like to see me doing more of?
- Are there any times when I can or should be taking more advantage of my level of authority?
Go ahead and listen to the podcast – it’s about a half hour and free. Only good can come of this!
PODCAST TRANSCRIPTION
Hello and welcome to the Skirt Strategies podcast, the podcast to help you get the support, validation, and skills you need to accomplish your goals and really succeed in a male-dominated world, all without having to give up your incredible female strengths.
It’s another podcast of Skirt Strategies for women in leadership.
Katie: I would say Skirt Strategies podcast – another installment. I’m Katie.
Carol: And I’m Carol and that was Katie singing earlier.
Katie: You caught me on that.
Carol: I did.
Katie: That’s just a little extra bonus for our listeners. We’re on Tip Number 17. We’re going through the book Skirt Strategies: 249 Success Tips for Women in Leadership.
Carol: And Tip 17: Always be clear to your superior about what you believe your level of authority is.
Katie: If you have a boss this applies to you. If you don’t have a boss how old you adapt this, or what would be the corollary?
Carol: Well the corollary is be sure and be clear with your– the people that work for you, about their level of authority.
Katie: The people you are accountable to, which could be customers too, but I don’t know whether you talk about authority to customers.
Well let’s talk about people you are accountable to, like bosses, to your superiors, especially those of you who are in bigger organizations.
Carol: It’s interesting. I don’t think of myself having a boss but in fact, I have a board of directors and they are my boss so I have to do this quite a bit. Come back to them, make sure that we’re on the same level as far as where my authority is.
Katie: Okay, that’s always a good idea. Is there a typical conversation that you do to make this happen? And is it an easy one.
Carol: It’s easy because I’ve just kept it in our repertoire and I just continually ask, “Is this something I need your authority or your signature on or is this something that I can do on my own?”
And pretty much if it’s in the budget it’s something that I’m responsible for. If it’s something that outside of the budget than I need to come back to them.
And if it’s something political I usually come back to them for a CYA.
Katie: Good job. So you’re making those conversations happen. Did you notice dear listeners, that there’s initiative taken there. And maybe it’s not even just initiative but it’s also clarity around which you’re going to ask.
Carol: It is and it’s also – I think not being a victim of the circumstance, so I take the initiative to ask, “Is this something that you need me to ask you before I go forward?”
Katie: I would never assume that because it’s a boss, even if it’s a board, that they know better than you.
Carol: That doesn’t sound right.
Katie: That they are more – that they are the ones that are going to set the parameters of your authority because often it has to be self-initiated. No one’s going to look out for you like you.
Carol: That is right. But you always don’t want to push the envelope too much if you do have authority figures in your life. If you have a boss you don’t want to push that envelope too much.
Katie: Like ask for too much?
Carol: Or try to delegate too much. You really want to know where their boundaries are for you. I think that’s what we are talking about.
So when we talk about me having a board of directors it’s a little bit different although it’s not and you do need to take initiative when you’re asking your boss what they think your level of authority is.
Katie: I think you could look at this as, to what degree are you delegated to? By anybody, who delegates to you, and are they delegating the degree to which you would like, or expect?
And are you having a conversation about it? So if I’m the boss, this would be a conversation about how to delegate to others, right?
Carol: True.
Katie: But as me, the person that’s the subordinate, this is a conversation about how am I making sure that my boss is clearly delegating to me. And delegating is not an easy skill.
Carol: It’s very difficult.
Katie: It’s got a little bit of head issues with it, I think.
Carol: Well it had head issues and the biggest head issue is that, “Oh my god I could just do this so much faster if I just did it myself.” But then very soon, if you are a boss, you find out that no, you can’t do everything yourself and I learned early on in the restaurant business, you really just can’t do everything yourself.
At some point you have to delegate and you have to tell people what their jobs are and you have to be very clear about what their jobs are or they are not going to get it done, which was difficult for me as a women going into an industry where a lot of men were working for me. Some were people that were older than me so it was not an easy thing to do. But I was boss and I had to figure out how to delegate.
Katie: I find that it’s easy to assume, this is the conversations these dialogues about delegating and level of authority, I think it’s easy to assume what somebody else is going to do.
For instance we use a lot of contractors at Skirt Strategies. We’ll use people for tasking, mostly IT kind of stuff, for web stuff. Or social media things and I outline for them, I always put it in a list. But there’s always something in there when I’m delegating, for example a little project, do this, then do this, then check for this. There’s an underlying assumption that I’m expecting them to be creative with their own initiative, and I never quite come out and articulate it because if they are self-initiating, they are going to do that for me.
And more often than not, I just – I don’t know what it is, I think if I have to ask them to take initiative, they are not the kind of person that does it.
Carol: Interesting yeah and that’s not necessarily true. It’s possible that you just haven’t outlined that that’s part of their responsibility.
Katie: Yes and here they are, from the subordinate point of view thinking, well I don’t want to cross any lines. I don’t want to go too far by making her think that I’m clocking up extra hours by doing this extra bit.
Carol: Right. Interesting the difference between as somebody delegating to somebody that you want them to take the initiative and then as somebody who is being delegated to, you’re not sure if you should take the initiative.
Katie: Here are some questions. These are in the tip number in the book, some questions that could be included when you are talking to your boss.
Do you think I take as much initiative as needed?
Carol: I think that’s a brilliant question.
Katie: I do to. I don’t see how a boss could see that in any way intimidating. As a matter of fact I have a young women working for me now as an admin and it’s interesting because I’ve never had an admin and nobody in my office has so she’s kind of a general admin for all of us but none of us really know how to use her.
And she comes in to me all the time and she’s like, “Carol, I’m not doing anything. What can I do?” And I’m like, “Okay, we’ll – I’ve got a million things going on, I’ve got to figure out how to delegate something to her.”
Katie: Or having an intern. I have a list from here to eternity for an intern, you and I do, the thought of sitting down and figuring out what’s teachable and delegate-able and do I dare give them the password to this account? Could that be scary?
So that’s a great question. Do you think I take enough initiative as needed? You could even morph that into, is the initiative that I’m taking what you expected me to? So you could talk about expectations in that.
It could be that you are fearful of the answer being, no you are not taking as much initiative as needed. That’s okay.
Carol: Right well then that gives you the ability to now take more. So don’t be afraid of that answer. Now you can take more and if somebody says stop, then you can say I guess that was too much.
I really appreciate people taking initiative and not seeing themselves as a victim of circumstance. You know the young lady that works for me, she could just sit at her desk and look at Facebook all day if she wanted to but instead she’s taking the initiative and asking me if there’s more to do. And in fact there is I’m just not being smart about using her time well.
Katie: Another follow on question.
Is there anything you’d like to see me doing more of?
Even though there’s a dangling participle in that.
Carol: That’s okay, the whole tip has a preposition hanging –
Katie: No it doesn’t, does it?
Carol: What’s your level of authority is?
Katie: Is a verb not a preposition. Well yes you could round it out a little bit okay. Okay Mrs. Grammar.
Carol: I’m not. I am so not.
Katie: Is there anything you’d like to see me doing more of? That’s great. If I came to you and said, “Is there anything you’d like to see me doing more of?” It’s going to make you think, and now we’re going to get more done.
Carol: Well and it also just makes you look like you’re trying to do better in the situation and so these are pieces of initiative, just simple questions to ask your boss that will really make you look like you’re trying to do your job and do it better.
Katie: Follow on question.
Are there any times when I can or should be taking more advantage of my level of authority?
Carol: Oh. More advantage of and I don’t know if that’s the right part of the question but once you establish what your level of authority is, and I think you have something on your level of delegation –
Katie: I do I have something that my friend Tim Daniel shared with me, a model that he called the freedom to act model. The aha with that model, it’s around delegating, so it’s settling authority between two people or the level of activity that someone’s going to take when you delegate to them, including the level of authority. The aha around that when I first was exposed to that and this is not huge but if you’re kind of new in leadership it is, is that you don’t either delegate or not. It’s not black or white. It’s a whole continuum.
If you’re thinking, I don’t know if I should delegate this, this is perfect because I’m just thinking about an intern and what I might be holding back with delegating to an intern or to a contractor. What I might be holding back because I don’t want them to go so far as blah, blah, blah. Then delegate everything but the going so far as blah, blah.
So the degrees look like at one end complete freedom to act and that’s delegating the whole shebang.
You have the authority to take this issue, come up with recommendations. You can delegate to the extreme degree, the whole shebang. And that might look like, take this project, determine what you think the best options are, pick the best option, implement the best option, follow through on it, no need to follow back with me and report out. That’s the whole thing. I am essentially giving it to you.
Next step back might be all of the above except report to me what you decided to do.
Carol: I’m writing this down.
Katie: Okay. And there’s not much risk in coming back and reporting to me so I don’t know whether those last two would be really that different. Tell me what you did vs. don’t tell me what you did.
Carol: Well I do think that that keeps the level of authority in your hands rather than their hands. So if they’ve got complete freedom to do whatever, that’s one situation but if they are reporting back to you that’s a different one and I like the fact that that’s part of the model.
So I’m going to put together this model and make sure that we get it in the show notes. So if somebody is listening while they are exercising or doing something else and can’t write it down, we’ll do that.
Katie: And the next level down, I won’t go through all the levels because they are kind of obvious but the next level down might be, go look into this, see what the options are, select an option, come back to me, let’s decide together. And then you can go implement it. Or let’s decide together and I’ll implement it.
See there are all sorts of slices and dices to it. And then maybe let’s go to the other end of the continuum which is not very much freedom and that might be you have no authority to do anything.
Carol: No freedom, no authority, just sit at your desk and welcome to the job.
Katie: Go find out what the options are and come back to me. And there’s some value in that because you’re giving them exposure to the project or whatever it might be that you want them to start getting up to speed on but you’re freeing the reigns a bit.
Remember any time you’re delegating don’t take it back. Don’t take it back. If you set a certain guideline for what someone is supposed to go forward with, now I realize I am taking as the delegator now, don’t change your mind later. That is the kiss of death for your credibility as a leader, and people having faith in you.
I’ve seen it happen in such a way where it was a big decision and then the decision was taken back after the decision had been announced and so and so was going to go do this and now the boss says, “Oh so and so is not going to go do this.” And so and so was kind of caught off guard by it. Now everyone’s on eggshells because they are thinking, is that the way we make decisions around here?
So you set a pattern for what it’s like to work with you with every decision you make. Stick with it.
Will things need to change eventually? Sure. Sometimes you have to change a decision but if that’s happening a lot then I would bid that you need to take a look at whether you are making decisions too reactively.
Carol: Interesting, well very good so that has to do with if you are the boss.
If you are not the boss and you are being delegated to you might even say, “I understand we have this project. Let me go out and find the options and report back to you. How’s that?”
Katie: Oh that’s awesome.
Carol: That’s a ton of initiative right there in that one little sentence and all of a sudden you’ve taken this huge burden off your boss. Now you have to deliver and you report back, “Here are your three options. What would you like to do in the situation?”
Katie: But you could do it in a way where it felt a little bit safe for you. Now again we’re talking about taking the delegation from upward, so taking the authority from upward, making sure it’s okay with him or her, and the conversation needs to outline where in that freedom to act are you suggesting? You are probably asking.
So I would like to volunteer for this project or this decision or this upcoming milestone, whatever it might be. I would like to take this next step over, find out what some of the options are, come back to the table and take a look at it with you and take a look at it with you as to what decision can be made.
And notice I didn’t say what decision I can make, what decision can be made. I put it in the past so that it leaves it open for debate.
Carol: That can be made by me or by you.
Katie: Intentionally vague. Not I’m smarter than you so it should be me. Somewhere around the whole concept of this discussion is the dialogue around expectations. If you’re feeling like you’re not getting delegated to or your authority is not clear, you may have to step back just a little bit and have a conversation around, what are our expectations around one another?
Am I developing or are you feeling like you can delegate things to me? Are you too busy to delegate things to me?
Carol: Is there something I can do to make your job easier?
Katie: Is there something about me that makes you nervous about delegating to me? That would be a raw conversation.
Carol: That would be but you’re always very good about expectations and expectation-setting and I think that’s something that we’re not always that great at so when you have a project, when you are delegating to somebody, it’s very important to set those expectations and if you’re being delegated to, very important to ask what the final outcome expectations are.
Katie: Good.
Carol: So I’m making sure that what I think you want is what you want and you’re making sure that you are getting what you want, right?
Katie: Yes. It’s kind of a mirrored effect. Here’s what I want. Here’s what I think you want. You would say, here’s what you want. Here’s what you think I want.
Carol: So that’s interesting and true. We really do need to figure out that expectations and some people are not very communicative and so you don’t know what your boss’s expectations are and you are absolutely flummoxed over how to take initiative within your job. What would you say to that person?
Katie: Understand that there’s a certain level of emotional intelligence with some people that makes it easier to converse and maybe some of it’s generational.
For an example my – I think I can have a conversation around some things with my parents and then I notice if I get too much into it, it’s not that I lose them it’s just that they don’t want to talk about – my mom with get into depth with stuff with me but my dad and stepmother I think, there’s – I don’t know if it’s uncomfortable or they just don’t ever do it. So I don’t want to assume that they are not capable. I think they probably are I think it’s possibly the role.
So if you’re in a role of a supervisor and a subordinate, is it a little, depending on how your relationship is, is it a little bit uncomfortable starting to talk about expectations of one another if it seems negotiating. I wouldn’t say it should be but I know that it can be. I know that there are some people who can’t have that kind of conversation.
Carol: It seems confrontational to some people.
Katie: Yes that’s exactly what it is. It seems confrontational and so it becomes a little bit uncomfortable. But digging up some of that of course this is me coming from someone that’s married to a psychologist who digs that stuff up all day with patients and me, so it’s not comfortable. I would say it’s not comfortable for me but I don’t think of it as not normal or confrontational. It could be done in a confrontational way.
Carol: And that you want to avoid.
Katie: That you would like to avoid. So that expectations setting conversation ought to be just the norm and not something to run from.
Carol: Do an expectations –
Katie: Practice one?
Carol: Yeah.
Katie: An example.
Carol: I think that’s important.
Katie: Okay let me do it as a boss and somebody that’s working for me who I have on a project – I’m going to use a fundraising project in the office and I want to spread around the number of hands that are in the project, which is really good because it’s good exposure for the office.
It kind of goes into what our next topic is. If I find Jeanette, for example just to come up with that name and Jeanette works for me, and I want Jeanette to maybe have a little bit of say so in something I think she’d be good at it. Maybe it’s the registration and money collecting. So I approach Jeanette and I say Jeanette I’d like you to think about how you want to participate and I’m staying real general, participate in the upcoming project. Any ideas? I have an idea but I’m asking the question first.
Carol: Good.
Katie: And Jeanette might say, “I don’t know. I haven’t really thought about it but I’m really good at organizational stuff or party planning or whatever issue it might be.” So that starts to go to the role setting and then we have the expectation setting so the role setting is around, “Okay Jeanette, can I have you take over the whole registration process? Can you make sure that you have the money collecting in there, the logistics, the paperwork, etc., and then if you need a certain amount of budget, that’s kind of a fork in the road, come to me at that point and let’s determine what your budget might be.”
Carol: Nice.
Katie: So I’ve given her the outlines of it. You might think that would be enough but I will promise you there will be things that come up that nobody could see.
Carol: Sure. Do we need name tags? Oh my god we have to print name tags.
Katie: And is there a target for how much we’re doing? What’s the expectation around what the registration fee is? Is this is a fundraiser, whatever. I would like to have her expect to come to me regularly to renegotiate if she needs to. So I would set that up in the expectation. Jeanette I expect you to feel comfortable to ask me when you’ve got some major decisions to make. I also expect you to go ahead and make the small ones yourself. Is that okay with you? So I get it back from her.
Carol: Nice.
Katie: There is kind of a key in there in that expectation setting that I think has to do with thinking first about what is most important to the other person. What is of value to Jeanette? Is it to be in the middle of something? Is it to have authority herself?
Carol: Is it to do great things behind the scenes?
Katie: And so we’ve just kind of negotiated what she’s going to go do but most of me was telling her what I expected. There ought to be a conversation that’s really driven around what is she expecting? She might have to settle into the project first before she knows that but I also want to know what’s of value to her and what’s important to her.
And maybe it’s important to her not have to have to workweek ends to get this thing done and maybe my expectation is well, maybe but the weekend before the event you’re going to be busy so my expectation is you’re going to be there.
Carol: Nice.
Katie: Does that help?
Carol: Yeah it does. And I do this quite often. I don’t do it as thoughtfully as maybe I should just I delegate to people all day long. If it’s part of their job description it gets delegated to them and sometimes it’s merely an email that goes on to them that says, “Do something about this.”
Katie: Yeah.
Carol: So there is a point where I need to set some expectations and say, “Okay I expect you to report back to me on a regular basis.” And I’m not necessarily doing that with my subordinates and then I don’t know that I’m always asking that of my – you can’t call them superiors can you?
Katie: Yeah I guess you could – the board?
Carol: There are not superior to me.
Katie: My upper echelon.
Carol: Yeah the people I report to – the board.
Katie: The reportees. There’s a little bit of danger, this is a good thing, not the danger but it’s a good thing to get comfortable with someone to the degree where you kind of know each other’s expectations.
For example I was using a model about resilience that comes from a colleague organization of mine, the Cumberland Group. They are consultants. I do some consulting with them sometimes and they have some great material that I occasionally adapt and use I generally ask them, “Are you okay if I put this in a book?” Every single time it’s always been, “Yes.”
I was putting some material together this morning and it was a model of resilience and I thought I really like this model. I remember it and I’m going to drop it in this class that I’m using.
I started getting so comfortable about using it myself that my expectation was I don’t even need to ask them. I’d be careful about that. I think their expectation might be – they might say that their expectation is that I can use almost anything but that I ask every time. I don’t know. We’ve never had that conversation.
Carol: It might be nice to have it.
Katie: I just ask every time and they say yes.
Carol: And maybe next time you ask, you say, “By the way, is it okay if I use this without asking you? If not I’d be glad to ask you every time.”
Katie: Exactly. I always put a link in back to their business and so give them a little credit.
Carol: All right. Well we have talked about how to be clear to your superiors about what you believe your level of authority is and we’ve even talked about being the superior in this case and setting expectations.
Katie: Everything you need to know.
Carol: We appreciate you being with us.
(Music plays)
That’s it for this episode of the Skirt Strategies podcast. Thank you for joining us and please be sure to leave a question or comment at Skirtstrategies.com. Remember that success comes when you lead using your natural female strengths.
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